Lightworkers: Remembering Self Care

all right so we've had a a great run the last several weeks sort of on a theme um we don't have that like premeditated when we have talks we just kind of go with either what you're asking for on the spontaneous on the moment the day or sometimes someone might request something a day or two before and i might go with it but it's all pretty spontaneous typically and so it wasn't planned but we went with this theme i guess in a nutshell about identity knowing who we are i mean it's just that's the essential thing

everything we do in life is based on believe it or not is based on who we believe we are you can say i've been married three times that's determined based on who you believe you are i was an addict that's coming from who you believe you are i won the lottery at space everything you can experience my children are great my children are troubled all of it is a reflection of us and what we believe about ourselves now some of us go but i don't get it because i'm a really nice person and everybody in my life is nuts so how

could that be reflecting me i'm actually decent i wouldn't argue that to you i wouldn't i wouldn't say you must secretly be a nutty person no i think you are a good person if you believe you're a good person but deep deep on a soul level there's these purgings that happen i mean i've had it happen where i clean a vessel a cup something you know like i wash a dish and then i when i wash the dish i always check it one more time my hand and i'll go oh there's still a little bit of food i can tell it's

always cheese because that's all i eat but there's some cheese that's baked into the pan see and i find it so that's it my the plate is clean i'm not hallucinating when i go oh i did clean it i did put work into it you did work on yourselves give yourselves credit oh but there's a little something so what clean that now you don't have to undermine the work you've done just because of one little piece left so yes people in our lives magnify because that's what people are the world

does this but people magnify if if if the people that annoyed us would simply walk up to us and hand us a business card hi in a few minutes i'm going to act like a complete jerk but i'm actually just magnifying one thousand fold one little spark of lesson for you you know it'd be easier to deal with it okay go ahead okay it would be easy but nobody does that you know they don't typically take responsibility go look here's where i'm coming from they they vent and and so a course in miracles tells you

if you would understand that everything is either love or the cry for love it would change the way you see it all so people don't do that they don't go hi i'm going to give you a cry for love today so i really need you to be patient with me instead hi uh honey i know we've been married you know 10 years 50 years and not once if i've been faithful not one year have you know and you just go oh my god but they forgot to go i'm about to bring up some stuff you know and and it's a cry for love

if people could do that it would be easier but they don't that doesn't mean our job is to blame them for not showing us their business card our job is to know this keep knowing it keep reminding yourself at the beginning of every day be with me lord i'm going in you know and if i'm not back in one hour sending the troops after me like basically think of it that way it's this is what's called a light worker so that's we're going to talk about i just realized so good being a light worker but but

back in the 80s i i came up with that term light worker all right i i don't know it was because i i think of god as light so i ended up making up the name light worker now there's a lot of people on the internet that use the term they don't remember or credit that i did that because they you know whatever that's the way people are but what i like about it is i came up with the term myself and i had other things like my newsletter was the light bringer the light were you know bear that's the way i was doing things and

still do but i had the this term lightworker all i'm pointing out here is people are on the internet saying lightworker and they're giving you the definition it's my term don't tell them the definition for my term and they'll say a light workers are fifth dimensional beings they're in touch with aliens and they'll have all kinds of you know and they're friends of sasquatch and they have all kinds of cute definitions but no you didn't make up the word i did so here's my definition and it's simple

god is light if you're working on anchoring the presence of god in the world you're a light worker that's it you don't add other stuff you don't make up other stuff it's lightworkers and and i tend to capitalize the word even when i use it because the light in the word lightworker is supposed to be the light of god but some people don't get that either so what i'm saying is we're all light workers when we decide to anchor the light of god i don't care if you're doing it as a mommy

as a social worker as a nurse a doctor as a healer reiki practitioner whatever even if you simply work in construction but you try to make a difference in people's lives you're a light worker what i would recommend is owning it a bit more instead of sort of accidentally being a light worker i think your life can change if you go wow i you know i i think i'm going to commit not just do good i'm going to do it in the name of god not just be a human who does a bit of good but recognize recognizes this is my soul's purpose

and then everything starts ramping up now that the good news is when you own i'm a light worker when you know your identity the curriculum of your life starts to fall into place when you don't know who you are when you don't know what you're doing with a relationship tell me about your relationship well i don't know we're doing okay but i'm not sure the uncertainty will bring hell that's the seemingly unfair rule of this universe what you do not know and as an affirmative yes to becomes everything else it's not

yes no and maybe it's yes or anything else when you don't know who you are the ego of this universe is going to decide for you it has the right because we gave up our divinity seemingly many many many many millions of years ago and when we did we gave power of eternity to the ego and said anytime i don't know who i am you get to decide for me and the ego is like wow this is like great because it can count on humans doing that never stepping in and taking control of their lives and owning who they are

so when you say i'm married but say i'm gay and i'm married and we're conflicted because i'm i'm trying to trying to fix i'm trying to show good to my parents you know i'm i'm a guy and i'm married to a woman the way you wanted me to or i marry the race you wanted me to and so on if it's not authentically you you're going to pay for it and when you do that that oh my god that challenging moment of here's who i am let's say in this instance gay they i don't care what they do they you

know whatever they can oh my god that's their problem own it because even their whining is a test for you to hold your center mom dad yeah i know this might be an issue for you but it is the way it is and if you want to you can say and you know what i'm going to do i'm going to i'm going to give you 90 days to cope i'll check back in 90 days when i call to check in if you're going to say anything other than you are our beloved child in whom we are well pleased don't answer the phone and i'll know

your answer that's all you got to do put everybody on notice you know this is where i'm at and it could be mom dad i know you helped put me through law school but i'm a florist i can feel it i'm a fl i want nothing more when i wake up and go to sleep i'm thinking of flowers that's me yeah i'm going to own it no they again then when i went 90 days notice call them 90 days they don't answer you're done you're a florist and you don't have parents now you're an orphan florist you can

even open a store orphan for flores it let it become you whatever you are just more and more step into it okay i won't go any further with that you get the idea but even the word light worker that's who i am that's what i do it's because what i do comes from who i am this isn't like unusual news remember i shared in the identity conversations one of the points i made was jesus's parents oh jesus is missing where's he going and they're looking around when they find him he's like why would

you be looking anywhere did you look at a bar where did you i'm 10 and you know what i'm about i'm i'm a divine being what made you think you had to look go to some place where people are talking about god you know they're like oh we've been looking at liquor stores and we were looking you know at all kinds of places the bocce ball court figure out where he was it was simple so when you know who you are the rest starts to fit in there i've had a counseling session you know i remember one many years ago

where this gal you know she was beside herself about her partner and you know it's a guy she met and they were oh we're in a wonderful relationship and then about a year later they were in crisis and they came to me for a conversation and and her whole thing was you know well you know he's he's still you know he's flirts with other women and this and that the other i said now wait i know this guy i've seen him in many places i've talked to him many times i said knowing him even though i

i don't think it's cool to to fool around you know and do all these kinds of things here's the thing i admired he announced it when they met and when he met anybody else just fyi even if i date you this is how i am i'm going to date other people so she's doing that but but you know i can't believe he's doing him but didn't he tell you yes he did who has the problem here you want me to fix him he was actually the only honest one of the two of you you needed to own honestly this is where

he was coming from so and i didn't say it as firmly like but this is the way it is i i really admired i didn't agree with the style and all that other person but in this instance i admire that he said this is how i am this is how it's going to be and i think that was very cool when you know who you are make it clear who you are therefore what you're about therefore what people can expect is that making sense all right so if you're a light worker that's what people should could expect from you the

downside is that light workers although it sounds like i'm a light worker you know when you say it you expect you know some some sort of you know grandiose announcement but one of the things that comes with being a light worker there's going to be two that i'm going to address one it takes a new level of responsibility if you're going to say i'm a light worker instead i just accidentally do kindness lightworker means this is my life i'm not going to accidentally do it once in a while i mean this is what i'm about

this is what you can expect from me the second thing which overlaps the first is that often when you're a light worker you you forget your own needs and you start overly taking care of others it's just one of the hazards of the job so that one i want to address i guess more more specifically because most people listening to this type of talk i mean there's an occasional person that would be listening online or whatever and they go i'm not into this at all fine then they should go on somewhere else

but if generally if you're watching this there's part of you that understands what i'm saying you're either totally already committed to being a light worker or you're kind of like well maybe that applies to me great either way i'm cautioning you on the issue of self-care because light workers are often the types like i said social workers nurses and so on who often care for everybody and not themselves as much and i guess i'll give you a very vivid example of this but the vivid example i'll share from my

life was given to me in a specific instance i'll share but deep down what i was told first of all if you're a light worker michael you're going to need to look at the deeper meaning of this event when you're a light worker that's one of the other things that you start to do besides responsibility besides more self-care it's also taking responsibility to to look at the deeper meaning of things not over analyze life but do listen when things happen look at how it applies to a bit more so i'm going to share a story of mine

but i'm asking you to do what i was told which is ask yourself how this is applying to you as i share the story because it's not an accident that i'm sharing the story all right a story or two whoever whatever comes up okay so so tune in instead of going michael's telling us about his life no that's not a light worker a light worker is somebody that goes oh crap this applies to me too doesn't it i'll give you a few examples so that you can't get escape with at least one of them hitting you

landing so you know just zip on your velcro suit because something's gonna hit and stick okay for me you know um this was a very kind of interesting story the one that's coming to mind first for many many many years i mean you know traveling and traveling and traveling so my life for 40 years has been touring and traveling a lot but it made for precarious kind of scenarios one of them kind of a a simple thing there's a certain amount of loneliness when you're by yourself and you're traveling and that's all you do

but it wasn't a physical loneliness for me it was more of a mental like like who can i connect with right do you understand you feel that so some of you might already be tuning into that now we're asked okay look this this idea of of dealing with the stuff that humans go through but you're asked to be doing it at a different level a more responsible level so i'm kind of going look i know that i'm serving god i know that god appreciates all that i do for people all i or we do for people and i'm realizing but at

the same time am i allowed to have needs if you're a light worker are you allowed to have needs are you allowed to have preferences or whatever else it is you know but as a human being it's like if you're going to be a light worker you have to kind of have a different mindset which is serve god serve others but also take care of your own needs and good luck because being a light worker already has this tendency to be selfless which means the world will tell you if you have needs yourself ish is that making sense okay let that land

so so for me even with past life influences in this lifetime there was a part of me constantly pushing that away like like i'm going to call it shaming having needs now it might not have been full on shaming but it was there a bit so it was like i shouldn't have needs all right so this had to show up for me back in the 90s it showed up it showed up here and there but here's an instance of how it manifested so one time i'm flying across country and my flight landed in uh vancouver bc now i was living in the northwest so

not only am i arriving in bc i i fly flying across country i still have a couple hours drive to get home so it's traveling all day and uh and i'm thinking and the way i feel is when i when i finally get home which is only for a few days a month i'm looking forward to getting home is that okay or is that selfish but i'm looking forward to getting home now is is it okay that i get home and and take care of things there because even there i'm still taking care of things you know and but is it okay

i'm gonna get home have a few days is that meaning that i'm happy to not be on tour and helping people no no no you you know the ego's going to mess with you like that no so i was very clear and i was happily putting my life 23 hours a day for people but can i have needs one hour just one hour so i fly all this way now i tell my ride it's a a partner or friend uh i'm going to be arriving will you pick yes i'll pick you up you know as usual okay pick me up great then she says can we can we get something to eat i want to

get home but you want food all right fine so then while i've picked a restaurant we'll you know get something to eat can we do fast food oh no they want to go and sit somewhere to eat i want to get home and it's later at later and later at night so okay so i get there they're not even there and they got delayed for a couple of hours i end up in a cab this is see a lot of you people are too young to remember they used to have these taxi cabs you know you all are into uber back in the old days when i was a kid

um we had taxis so i take a cab to this restaurant they're nowhere to be found and they're not even there for a couple of hours so i'm like you know okay i get in line the line's coming out the door this restaurant okay fine all right so i'm waiting in line and you know and it's like there's all kinds of confusion and there's empty tables but the line's not moving i'm going what so finally we you know i realize and while i'm in line conversations light workers weird random conversations will happen

it's a symptom of being a light worker so i'm in line and you know somebody's bringing up the bizarre differing conversations i mean like one person brought up a song uh you know and we're talking about a song remember that artist oh yeah you know i'm just chatting about that another person brought up erectile issues believe it or not um somebody else is bringing i mean different conversations and i'm like wow this is just bizarre but you're a light worker so you know you you you kind of move

now if you don't own the euro light worker this is going to seem surreal you're going to think god people are strange why are they bringing this up why are they talking to me you won't ask that when you own you're a light worker this is the norm so it's like okay this person's bringing up this song another person this personal issue this other person something else and and but but i'm going the line's not moving something's on so i realize that the the hostess is dealing with

these pages that are a mess with names okay the the the my dad party you know or whatever right um and and none of it's working so i go up there and there's these clipboards and i said you know could we get fresh pages so you know now you're stepping into management level as a light worker so so i said can i get some fresh pages so i get fresh pages on the clipboard then i go down you know names you know getting names of people and i said now just call out these names and you know so they start doing it

everything's cool now in the meantime i go back and my spot in line is gone so i have to get the back of the line again because you're a light worker you don't want to bring up an issue and you don't want to bring up anything that could be confrontational you're a light worker so you go to the back of line by the way going to the back of the line is fine if you're okay with it if you are not okay with it you are rescuing you are sacrificing very unhealthy if you're conflicted like i wish i would get my spot back if you

feel that way get it back because if you go and give it up oh no i'm just helping others i'll just go to the end of the line you're being a rescuer it's not healthy and i'm telling you it will come back and bite you you have to be true to yourself so i i was fine i was like oh okay whatever my person's not here anyway so i go to the back line now when i'm at the back of the line another issue pops up there's some lady was out in her car and she was trying to clean out her car or whatever

and her her dog got out of the car and it's running around chasing the stray dog okay uh now okay now i'm gonna go i go out and i get the dogs and i calm them down you know and then she ended up adopting them and took both home great fine i go back in the restaurant oh the line's gone down look at this this is great people have gotten seated however many there were they're all seated it's like nice by this time somebody walks by they were one of the people that got seated after my little clipboard thing

so i they got seated they're on their way out and they're like hey thank you so much i'm like no worries man glad to help light worker so now it's like now it's like oh here's where i can say oh money pod me mother father mother god we're gonna manifest a perfect table right over there there we go there's a couple empty tables now anyway they're cleaning great could you mind if i go and say oh i'm sorry we're closing boom boom boom you know like you just want to go

what did you not know that i'm a light worker and you're supposed to feed the light workers instead uh you know but but at the same time there's a i swear there's a part of me that does laugh at these kinds of things when i'd be on tour and miss a flight cause somebody else wanted to fly fine and i just left i'm sitting on the floor of some stinking airport for hours and hours and hours and hours because somebody needed a flight now you gave it up you know i said it's okay you know i i

thought it was funny at times and i would go and you know before they would close the uh stores you know i'd go and grab something a donut nice and nutritious for the night um you know and something to drink and i would just sit there and just that was my life alone constantly in airports and odd things but i really felt pretty like like okay with it if you're a light worker and you feel okay with the things you do blessings to you anytime you feel conflicted you better think twice okay now done we think my ride shows up

and i'm like what happened oh you know i was just running late and like brushing me off okay but i'm a light worker i can handle it i can handle it it's fine and it's true that as a light worker please remember look at the deeper meaning of what's happening i didn't just get dissed by somebody that was supposed to be there and be my ride and i wanted to get home you know i do that's in my mind when i'm stuck in an airport and all that in those days in my mind i would partly just think

about where i'm going i'm going to get home and i loved where i lived and we had a beautiful retreat so i just looked at the light at the end of the tunnel and that kept me up inside does that make sense okay so give yourself the light at the end of the tunnel whether you're a light worker or not whether you're struggling a lot or not focus on the light of where you're going and it really helps you move and navigate through stuff that might otherwise be a bit channeling all right so for me that worked it was like okay

i'm gonna you know i can't wait to get home but i'm not getting home and this doesn't work and then the person shows up and they're like oh well you know no big deal and i'm thinking wow so i realized god was saying to a degree you know michael i think it's great that you help people i think it's great that you like helping people i i mean this is fantastic but i want you to also care about yourself and this is not just god to michael 40 years ago 30 years ago this is to you now you have to figure out if this is

accurate and this meaning there's meaning behind this for you where are you allowed to say what about me but not be selfish not feel selfish what about you and i know there's lots of people that that over they overuse that you know it's my needs and i want my needs met i'm like saying needs are silly most of the time needs often come from human ego so i'm not talking about egoic needs i'm talking about what you feel is a balanced lifestyle for me i'm working 23 hours a day for one hour can can i

take care of myself all right or figuratively that is you know one hour so i have to decide we have to decide if our own if we have value is the way i'm going to say it if you know who you are spiritually then you'll know that you have value and if you have value it's easier for you to own that you have needs if i don't have value my needs are egoic does that make sense if i don't know who i am my needs are come from neediness and codependence and gross things but you when you know who you are you can have

healthy needs when they came to arrest jesus at times they tried a few times before it actually happened do you know that he just said no i'm not in the mood and the soldiers roman soldiers walked away confused and you imagine going back to the authorities hey where's jesus well he said he wasn't quite in the mood to be arrested you know could you imagine that now roman soldiers actually get beat sometimes to death for not obeying so that wasn't good how and why did he do that because he knew exactly who he was

and what he was open to today i will not be getting arrested like the jedi mind trick you will not be needing to see our papers we will not need to say your papers you know so jesus was lying like i will not be arrested today okay and they walk away going wait what just happened seriously so if you can own who you are you can still have needs i am i'm needing you to not arrest me today done that's a healthy need so so i had to sit with this and allow this kind of conversation in the mind and this person who was inconsiderate didn't pick me up

on time and all that was a first mirror a major mirror of this it's not that they're bad it's i need to rethink this because they're mirroring my belief that i don't have value therefore you don't have to pick me up get that so i sat with this and realized all of a sudden i'm going wait the girl with the dog running and all the chaos she's mirroring chaotic parts of my life that i need to look at the dog's out of control wait it's not just her the animals out of control i'm seeing it as a mirror of my

life being out of control the dog being left in the car wanting to get out loneliness right the dog that was running around you know and nowhere to go that was me wanting to get home and eat or have something you know see what i'm doing so i'm going wow i get it each person is sort of playing a role so i sit with this you know in in the time that i'm sitting waiting for the ride and all that so haven't been fed haven't gotten home there's the homeless dog and i'm on the road all the time see the metaphors

so relationships out of control so i i keep looking at this oh the guy the erectile issues if you just walked in i swear that that fits this conversation the guy with the erectile issues that's me not not owning my power making potent decisions for myself so i got that going on but then the song remember i said we were talking about a musician and a song yeah that's a good one so the song from the 70s was we just disagree dave mason there ain't no good guy there ain't no bad guy there's only you and me

and we just disagree so i'm sitting there with that in my mind so this person is going to be pulling up thinking oh you know i just showed up whenever i wanted and in my mind really because we're done i've had some time to think while you've been wherever you've been you arrived and we're done and i was concluded and as i'm driving the couple hours home you know in my mind as they might be sitting there you know wondering if i'm mad or whatever one of the needs i'm allowed to call you

out for not showing up seeing part of me would be like oh i shouldn't and that's not spiritual guys it is too spiritual jesus called people out there were times when jesus said get behind me satan get out of my way there were times when he said man you people are nutty in the temple doing what you do you're you're doing day trading as part in a spiritual temple do spiritual related things you know called them out and they recorded it you know it's probably on zoom somewhere facebook you know jesus called people out

headlines you know um you know how dare him no he was right to do it all he was saying was this is alignment this is misalignment you guys are living here and not here he didn't hate him for it he just said this is what's happening so i had to allow myself finally to speak up and i knew what was going to come back oh well you're not being very nice you're not being very spiritual i'm not yelling and i'm not hating but in my head as i'm driving there ain't no good guy you know what i'm thinking

we just disagree but disagree that's not the words i ended it with in my mind i end and we're done this doesn't mesh because i'm gonna work 23 hours a day but one hour i need you to do something but this isn't like i made up what i wanted them to do it's pretty simple i need you to pick me up at the airport on time one of the reasons you're in my life as part of our agreement is to do these very things well i thought it was just about romance no i don't need romance if you're going to

be in my life one hour out of 24 do do something book a flight you know so it sounds so to some people so unreasonable i'm telling you that if you have demands 90 of the time on people it might be imbalanced but if you're the because the daddy was working hard the daddy was earning money the daddy was taking care and the mommy part of me was doing what service taking care of the kids constantly but never taking time to go to the spa see the inner mommy so the inner father was working hard the inner mommy was taking care of the kids

which is everybody on the planet but but not doing a spa day so so for mom to say you know what kids one of you is old enough you're driving i asked you to pick me up and you never showed up well mom you don't have to be that way mom's allowed to be that way she's she's allowed to say what the hell you know what's going on call people on things you're allowed it doesn't make you a bad woman or or person so so i did i i was like okay look the person or persons in my life that have ever been in my life

they had my credit cards they could do anything fly anywhere you want go anywhere you want eat anything do anything get spas get your nails done do whatever you want that was my gift give you everything just like i feel like i do for everybody everything i can give i give but if you're in my life as as part of my life and our agreement is that you have to do a few things just a few things book a flight instead of oh you know i was at the spa and so i didn't remember to book a flight so we might have to cancel a tour

i'm not going to be okay with that but i held it in and i held it in and i held it in too long and i had to find the balance where i can say this is now going to be part of a clear agreement i don't i don't need any like a partnership i don't need anything much of this world at all but but we'll have agreements for those who want to fulfill certain roles we'll have agreements you're a friend your friend that's fine but if you're going to get further into my life then you're further into my life and my

life is busy so you're going to have to understand that if you're further into my life there's things like that you got to deal with he's never around and all that if it's not working for you don't we just disagree there's no good guy or bad guy just own it so as light workers you don't have to make people wrong for not being able to fulfill your needs but you also don't have to let them make you wrong for having them it's fine balance balance mom would you be my ride to a

class i'm going to take at night let's say you say okay sure and then you say to them and i one of those nights i have to be somewhere so i'll give you the car and you pick me up and if they say no you're allowed to say contract broken it's okay because you're wanting to speak for your sake of balance but you're also teaching them about healthy balance so it was very you know it's very interesting to go through like the you know all the bits of these things because it's it's human stuff it's

day-to-day stuff and if you're a light worker especially in a role like i've been in all my life the teacher when is it okay for me to say look there's certain things i want happening right can you make sure i have a hotel and and if they booked me in some weird hole-in-the-wall place which only happened once in a while and and let me say there were times when i've had people in my life that did a great job getting things scheduled and all there have been great times i'm referring to the times when my life

your life when we go out of alignment out of control somebody has to reel it in the dogs running around outside your car it could get hurt reel it back in there are signs of impotence reel it back in be potent in your life be clear see just look at the areas the symbols of what's not working if you're driving on bald tires that's an accident waiting to happen well i don't have money to get them you know treads and whatever you know new tires and whatever i understand that i've been there we've

all been to those places in our lives but certainly don't number one act shocked if one blows out two don't blame someone else who you wished had given you alimony on time so you could get the tires stay home and chill if you have to you know don't don't get into hate don't get into blame so i don't want to sound like i'm enabling your venting on people because you're a light worker that's not what i'm saying you're seeking balance and what doesn't work you start trimming

off the extraneous stuff it's right to do god wants you to no god didn't say on the drive michael breaker the news now you know just slow to 20 and open the door you know you know god didn't say for me to do anything hurtful there's no good guy there's no bad guy it's simply done and to be able to sit with that and go you know and it's worth looking at why you're afraid to bring it up are you afraid of confrontation that's probably something for you to look at why is it a confrontation why are you

assuming that you're just wanting to take care of yourself the ego's going to tell you that you should either take from others or you should let everybody take from you it never wants you here it wants you out here being abused or abusing others a victimizer or a victim it never wants you to feel peace so today is also a reminder of that where's the peace and balance in your life and are you allowed to call it forward you know are you allowed to say you know i have anxiety over things that don't even need to be happening in my life

let me just reel this in so it's something that uh takes us to a whole new level of of responsibility now this is kind of funny because this isn't the only time that something like this happened in all my years this this is certainly kind of a pattern where i had to go when is it okay for me to say no and not be accused of being a bad person well that's that's an adolescent technique of theirs you know why are you gonna allow someone venting on you to to make you think you've done wrong only one reason if you don't know who

you are you make yourself susceptible to other people's opinions of who you are and what you deserve does that make sense think about that their venting or their retaliation on my speaking up for myself is only coming from my uncertainty which means thank you for showing me my uncertainty i'm gonna now fire you because i don't need to hire you anymore to show me my lack of value see so you can retire now and let them go but i do remember one time i flew into a major city and another time then this is

this is an odd one but there were these three gals and they're like well you've been here already an hour you know we've got all our luggage and we're leaving one piece got lost so they had to wait an hour so it was they saw me and they're like you're still here i mean where's your ride oh yeah and it was somebody that decided to stop and get something to eat on their way to pick me up so i was waiting and they went to mcdonald's which should have been faster than this but that's i digress so they didn't show up

for a while so i'm sitting at the curbside at this airport waiting for my ride they didn't show up and these three gals go by and they're going oh we're going out to get our rental car you want to go with us i'm like go where we're just doing a cross-country thing three caring girls the person not picking me up you know and i could own and laugh that oh this good one this because you know and god's like i'll give you five to one he's gonna you know and they're gambling on the other

on the other side they're like gambling is what's he gonna do and they know you know he's not gonna do it and i didn't but why did it manifest because guys if you ever saw the movie uh the one movie about jesus where he starts to die on the cross and he goes into a daydream of what life would have been like if he would have done life differently where he gets to just hook up with mary magdalene and be married and you know and have a different life so did any of you ever see that yeah what was the name of that i don't

know last temptation so here he is and all the churches were up in arms how dare them portray that shush you get to entertain the idea that what if just what if jesus did he ever have a moment and i swear that he did did he ever have a moment where he said this is the life i'm doing but what if i would have been just kind of allowing myself to just be a good guy and and be a guy and not this thing i'm doing and so you know the vision goes into him being in a relationship and it's it's really kind of cool the music by peter

gabriel made it even better so the last temptation of christ i think it was called or just the last temptation i don't remember what but anyway so check it out and and that's what it felt like i'm sitting there going wow i get to see what else i could have done michael is it okay if you just go play this would have been weird spontaneous and whatever well i'm on my way to a tour first of all i'm not gonna not do a tour for this but if i was on my way home what would i have done i i just in my life i typically never did

things like that i just never did even as a kid i just never went too far off into these other areas but what's beautiful is the concept am i allowed to ask myself yes what if then i have a choice once the what if leaks out of your being and manifests as an occurrence you need to decide which decision you're going to make and be true to it so if you say what if i didn't get married to somebody that really takes from me all the time you it's not coming up by accident you're being put in a position to say

i see the what if what am i going to do about it make a decision and leave or stay but whichever one you're going to do make sure you can do it well if i was your partner and i was a what if in your life and you were thinking about going i would say goodbye right now anyway i would want to encourage you to go to your what if until you were certain that this is what you wanted which sounds ludicrous to some people but i'm advising it but i'm also saying i would choose it myself i would live that way if i were in that same

circumstance so let yourself contemplate the what if but don't just sit there wishing do or don't do you know fully own it and so because i was so good at that in my mind i could sit there and say to them oh no no no it's good no come with us oh you seem like a great guy no we'll have fun i know i can do the math a blast but on the outside i'm going no no no thank you and inside i'm like what are you doing but inside you know that's inside outside and that's how i would deal with

things in my mind i would go through them and end up concluding and doing what i knew was the right thing not a sacrifice the right thing in my body soul for me and everyone concerned i was pretty good at that still am you know but that it's called in a sense spiritual conscientiousness but i still had to ask myself so michael once again good boy you know you're doing the right thing you're you're doing the the whatever you know the proper behavior and you know so on and so on but why are you manifesting the thought

why is there even a temptation it would not be there if i was totally happy with my circumstances it's true so in that circumstance i went i have to change my criteria of who's picking me up that's true you know be clear you said i need someone to pick me up well three girls tried to pick me up but that's different see you got to get clearer about the wording i meant a ride to you know my place um so this is all about combing out the knots you know combing or brushing out the knots and refining our lives

i'm a light worker and i still deserve good things good things doesn't have to mean wild things it just means i want to comb out things that aren't working for me so i got in the car with that person and they were like there was a weird vibe about it like this passive aggressive thing they did and in my mind i'm already done thanks for the ride you get me where i'm going and that's it i'm going to change who my ride is and everything in my in my touring style if i was booking you know events at

centers and i had snags all the time guys it's not right that they have problems at those centers they have a job to do things right but why is it in my life and i need to think about why is that coming my way and what can i do about it and make changes change what you can and accept what you can but absolutely step up and change what you can for who you because you have value if things are going weird it's a question of your value clean it up and say to the world no i have value not out loud but you're saying i get it oh my god i

get it now those three gals that were at the airport offering to pick me up they had no idea that in my mind i was thanking them because of what they symbolized i might have said no but thank you for the message the person that's late picking me up thank you this is going to come to an end you see you you find the things and you mirror you see them as a mirror and you take responsibility and you go here with it so that you can process it clear it heal it come back to the world with your conclusion you don't have to announce exactly all

your process i'm just saying your conclusion hey you know what i thought about this and yeah i realize it's this is done or this is going to change or this is whatever you know this is not okay for me so each of us has to take time to go what in my life even the story i told today some of them are going to going to be far away from your specific examples but you have your own anyway but some of them at least one might sort of rub up against something to say you know i felt that way before and what are you doing about it clearly

i've said this i don't know how many hundreds of times in my years teaching here for example if something's conflicted it's going to show up it's almost like having a cut that's got something in it it's going to get infected if you have a conflict it's like a cut and if you don't deal with it clean it up it's going to get infected when it gets infected humans get tempted to blame everybody for it getting affected infected but really i didn't remember to put something on it and clean the wound

i didn't want to clean the wound i knew it would hurt a little doesn't that sound familiar you know i didn't want to put alcohol on this cut it would sting too much great so now what do you have an infection and it's going to be more painful to deal with it same metaphor for our lives i didn't want to bring up something in our relationship because oh i knew it would go into an argument great now what do you have an infection more to deal with so learning to deal with these things on time at the right time and in the

right way because if you if you process properly it changes the way you do things i knew that the person that didn't pick me up they didn't have that neuron you know and i'm sitting there like noticing all the nuances of behavior oh well you know sorry like get over it and i'm thinking oh i am and the it is you no i didn't say that but but it's true it's like yes you you know i get it they're thinking that the conversations is about the linear event and i'm thinking this is a whole process you have no idea

where i've been in the couple hours you've been gone you have no wow i went everywhere with it i was dealing with dogs and clipboards in the restaurant and helping people and then not getting fed you know because they were closing all these things you have no idea how many dimensions i've processed through um and came up with some conclusions and they don't include you right i mean seriously so and i know that if i would have said right now out loud it's over i would have been blamed for reacting

to them being late and i would have been made wrong and bad right so i kept it quiet processing within myself and then made changes later in your life sometimes the changes you're going to make means you get a different travel agent sometimes it means a different relationship and if you don't want to do that no problem stuff it and i'm it should be obvious where that's going to go it's going to get infected any area of your life that's not thriving peace love happiness joy it's conflicted some part of you knows

it's off and you're not addressing it deny it minimize it etc it's going to get infected so just know in advance we you know we did the workshop last weekend uh called you're not going crazy you're just waking up and it's in the same vein of this when when someone didn't pick me up that was a dismantling meaning rug pulled out from under me when i'm going into deep places about this why god why am i in this relationship they just don't even care you know that's the emptiness the

disorientation becomes the moment the third stage where you're you know i'm saying well what am i going to do now you know but i'm in a relationship and you know what i should i would yeah all that stuff that's disorientation get still get quiet ask for guidance process and heal in those first three stages but eventually now where we going responsibly over the bridge to stage four and five which is rebuilding a new life and that's what i did i'm gonna change how i'm doing things and you know and then it's funny how

people no no i'll do it i promise i'll book the flights this time i won't forget next time i'll pick you up i won't i won't you um sometimes you'll feel right to say okay and you should if you feel right a lot of times by the time something like this happens i'm done you know it has to happen there has to be major things to happen or repeatedly but when i'm done i'm done so i wasn't going to go really gosh a promise now i know it's going to be different i i knew

i knew this was going to just happen again so think about this it might be a hard decision-making period for you but choose life okay i can tell from some of your faces you're like god i don't know why i came here today but now i've got to deal with a relationship when i go home but um you know it's it's it's it's the right thing you know and at the core if you didn't hear me look at the last few weeks we talked about value identity who am i really if i'm uncertain the world will reflect that if i don't think

i have value the world will reflect that and for me and with past lives of of service to humanity and all these things we took on many of us nuns priests monks from other lifetimes people doing spiritual work we carried with us as well as in this life we carried with us if you ask for something it's called selfish that was the ego teaching us that so that we never found the center so i learned no no selfish would be over here and the opposite extreme the rescuer the victim over here somewhere in the middle divine guidance on my spiritual my

personal needs my healthy needs and it's okay i found it to be flawed to have needs because that's what the world taught us but i saw through it and said no wait a minute it's okay but come from a balanced place and please remember be clear in your relationships if you're going to have needs be clear about what they are and know that if people are in your relationships if you whatever that right if it's a somebody that's your ride to work and they often don't show up or show up late

you're late to work your jobs at jeopardy say something and you know what they might do well i won't be your ride then and you can say well that would be the same as you being my ride you know i mean i know that's hard to deal with these things but the universe tends to support people when they choose things from their center that's what miracles are about someone making decisions that are righteous the world will tell you don't you dare because bad things can happen please remember and this is amazing that this happens

when i choose from my right self the universe supports that you'll get a new car and you won't need their ride you'll find a better ride a better partner a better travel agent the universe supports us when we come from the right place even if you have to end a job or divorce a relationship i can't oh i can't imagine once you do it you're going to say i should have done this sooner let's take a few centering breaths please um setting aside all the stuff of the world take a minute think back over what was

shared whether it's the perks and pitfalls of being a light worker or whether it was some of the lessons i shared from my own life look at your life [Music] where can you relate how can you relate have you in the past or currently are you experiencing those kinds of things there's something that's off and in the context of today that has to do with taking care of your needs yourself self-care the partner spends all the money on their hobbies so you can't go and get a massage that would be a good example

we only go on vacations to places they want to go that would be an example think of it as at work not just relationship work we're not talking about enabling ego needs we're talking about when you come from your center a healthy place inside and something is good for your healthiness spiritual healthiness emotional intellectual healthiness but someone or something keeps creating snags to where you can't get this the needs met why is that just imagine a couple of examples in your life do you need to make a micro adjustment

meaning just subtle changes or is it going to be a complete 180. be courageous you're not doing anything right now you're just asking yourself the way i did when i sat there waiting for another you know this ride fend off thoughts of shame or those kinds of things that could come up when you start considering your needs self-care it's good now consider this whatever instances you're thinking about in your life contemplating in your life this could be the first sign or it could be the last

if it hasn't blown up yet this could be because this is only the first time you're being told hey this area of your life needs your attention hello but it could be the last straw one more time you allowing this and it could blow up in a way that's not going to feel good do you want to gamble on which one it is or do you want to just say you know what whether it's the first or last i'm going to make changes now and if you own that you're going to make some changes hear yourself telling the universe

whatever drama you have prepared to shake me up and make me change this thing pause please i'm stepping into responsibility and i will initiate some changes take a minute to tell the universe hold it i promise i'm stepping in because if you don't make the changes the universe is going to help you make those changes and they might not feel pleasant often they're more dramatic when we've ignored doing it the easy way [Music] and lastly just visualize for a moment what if you initiate minor or major changes

and it changes everything that instance in your life is now back to a center balance you might not even be used to the such a peaceful kind of a life but imagine shifting it try to picture what it would look like and how the greater good would happen for everybody even people you might have had to bid farewell to picture them happy and well adjusted having moved on everybody being given the right to experience [Music] betterment [Music] ugh everyone feeling good including yourself calmer peaceful happier and then we close by giving thanks

we're grateful to hear the message reminder today we're grateful that we were willing and courageous enough to look at some instances in our own life we're also grateful that we imagined initiating those changes and seeing the beautiful results if we maintain faith and conviction in that direction it is not contrary the idea of being a light worker and having your needs met and so it is [Music] slowly reintegrate please you know i pray that this message worked

for you today a little bit different in in the sense that sharing a metaphor of an example in my life that you you might be able to see parallels to yourself so i'm sharing this story and how do you run parallel to that where does that apply in your life okay and if you can't parallel it do your own you know just look at your own lessons there all right all right thank you please stand yes dear um [Laughter] the word selfish she said if you fish for yourself you'll be able to fish for others yeah it's so beautiful if you think of

the balance to it self-less is an extreme selfish is an extreme but self in the healthy terminology health self-centered now i'm not saying people already misuse that word i know there's a negative but centered in self is beautiful because it's not going to be centered in my ego self because my ego isn't centered centered in my spiritual self it's it's it sounds so simple it's going to seem like a tall order because the ego wants to make it seem that way please take care of yourselves

okay please take time to say you know is it okay for me to you know instead of being the mom doing everything for everybody and going to bed exhausted yet again can i and you can be 20 and and not even have children and get that point it's not for mommies only it's it's the concept it's a metaphor do you have to be the selfless mommy who never gets her shoulders rubbed that's old school it's a lie the ego put us in to stop if i'm one with god it not only does god will for my good i'm allowed to step

into accepting it so centered in breath for a moment and for a few breaths breathe out thoughts to the concept let your shoulders drop and just like relief like oh you got to be kidding me ah you know just let go of the old beliefs the programs that you can't ask for dot dot dot just let it out and then be courageous enough to take a few centering breaths in with new from now on i'm going to be clearer people will know work will know partner will know children will know if they ask anything of me they're going

to know my answer is going to come from a healthy self and you cannot change my mind oh what a relief breathe in value oh my god this is so nice it's god's will that i be taken care of and then there's more of me to give to others anyway it's great god wills that i say no to unhealthy things oh i'm breathing in that reality which is totally congruent with our closing prayer the light of god surrounds us we are the light of god the love of god unfolds us the power of god protects us and the presence of god watches over us

wherever we go god is i am we are and so it is god bless you all thank you very much