How To Forgive Everyone: Your Ex, Abusers, and the Victim Within

this is Michael Mayer dad thanks for joining us for another evening of spiritual insights with Michael Muir dad today we're talking about how to forgive a lot of folks have been asking you know how to forgive and and there's lots of questions lots of variables you know how do I forgive if it's a long-term issue how do I forgive if it's someone close to me you know specifics like that so you know it's it's a little funny because each person thinks they have their their one thing that can't be

forgiven or that's challenging but it's different from somebody else's and in a sense they all end up the same at the end of the day anything can be forgiven there's nothing first of all there's nothing greater than the power that we are in our divinity and it's our divinity that forgives not our humaneness if your humaneness tries to forgive that means I'm a human person first of all by definition human I'm a limited being a human being dies a spiritual being does not so by definition I'm a spiritual being really

the human being is limited therefore you know human attempts to forgive are you know weak at best and there they're there they're weak they're just you're you're really scratching it anything you can get out of it like I I have to forgive I have to forget I gotta make myself forget that this happened none of that really works I must forgive this person you know and and yet it's almost painful to try that's not real forgiveness it's better than nothing any form of forgiveness is

at least moving the right direction but there are all kinds of false versions of forgiveness I say false any version is better than nothing but at some point we have to evolve beyond beyond the more simple the more shallow versions of forgiveness so we have to get past things like you know a time heals the time does not heal pick up a watch put it to any ailment arthritis and see if it heals it by sticking time to the arthritis it does not heal you know if you know me I'm a bit silly and irreverent this way but just you know I

just make fun of stupid things so time does not heal what time does is it gives you time to gradually forget something happened which does not mean it's forgiven it's sort of just not thought about as much anymore that's not forgiveness and if you're really if you're watching this and you really want to be sincere about forgiveness then you know we have to really look at the authentic pieces we're looking at how to truly forgive how to forgive your ex how to forgive your even the victim within how to

forgive abusers and there's there's a lot of really deep concepts that we have to wrap our mind around if we're really really deep dense rather three dimensional beings then the multi dimensionality of forgiveness will not really set in so if that's all you can do that's better than nothing you just start off with you know I really want to set the intention to forgive I'm gonna do my best to say prayers of forgiveness you know just be careful not to say god please fix this with this person because

God's gonna say great that would be you forgiving them so you you don't really go to sleep until God to fix God has already forgiven everything so it's not God that needs to forgive it's us mankind makes the errors mankind makes the judgments and so on so it's mankind that has to practice the forgiveness so just be careful not to you know inadvertently project that on to God you know everybody gets tempted at it once in a while but just you know do your best not to go that route because it's

not going to help so when we let's first you know address how the wounds even even happen and then we can go into forgiveness so what are we trying to forgive again you know betrayal wounds sadness loss there's there's all kinds of things essentially the list could be very long it'll list could be a hundred things for for one person but what are we really trying to forgive we're trying to forgive something that hurt if it didn't hurt if it didn't bother us we wouldn't even think we need to forgive it

something hurt something felt off we were betrayed we were accused wrongly we were harmed in some way abused and so a lot of forgiveness really has to do with this person or event did not fit what I would have liked it to be and that really come bounce that really compounds our our hurts even if our hurts were alike on a Richter scale of zero to ten a two it would compound it to a six just because it didn't fit what we wanted in other words if a stranger called you a name it might hurt a little if a loved one called you a really yucky

name man it really hurts a lot more you know if a person you barely know sort of betrays you an acquaintance it hurts when the person you love and trust the most does it it hurts a lot so why is there a difference simply because the person did not meet what we had hoped from them and that's why often you'll hear people say a lot of forgiveness really is forgiving ourselves so sometimes it's healthy it's healthy to say you know yeah I'm really mad at so-and-so and I'm wanting to sit and extend forgiveness to

this but it's also really wise and very powerful and very responsible to say and gosh I think I need to include myself in this because I I have to say that there's probably some levels of anger I feel frustration I feel because they didn't maybe they didn't meet what I had hoped them to be I wanted my dad to be Superman I wanted my mom to be you know a wonderful goddess I wanted my brothers and sisters to be this or that I wanted my partner to be one and only and I'm angry because we ended in a divorce you

know but a lot of times the the relationship was over a long time ago and we hang in there until they do something or we do something horrible then they get mad and they have a our time for giving but it was already over anyway so we really have to forgive ourselves because we are part of the problem we were what part of the ones that prolonged it just giving you know an example at this point so that's one thing to consider is that we play a part in a lot of this so forgiving ourselves is essential there's there's a saying

that I'm not going to repeat verbatim because I just want to give you a concept about this but it is we start off forgiving others they did that they did this they did that then you know on and on they they they he she and so on as we grow and if you want to know if you're truly growing spiritually there's people that think they're really spiritual and and it's because they read books or something cool like that they thought they heard voices so that's what they think makes them spiritual

forgiveness is number one and if you could argue that it's in the top three things that determine how spiritual you are far above how many books you read how many clashes you did your ability to practice forgiveness and forgiveness starts with me talking about others so if I'm talking about others I'm only in the infant stages of forgiveness and if forgiveness determines whether I'm quote-unquote spiritual or not and I'm still in the infant stages of this it speaks a lot it speaks volumes about

where I'm really at so people that you know one has a trill cosmic and their vow you know I'm channeling 15 dimensional beings that's nice how you doing with forgiveness because forgiveness makes you an ascended master the forgiveness clears you of karma and so forth not channeling I don't care how hide the beingness you could just have a really screwed up energy system that makes you open like open antennae to all kinds of beings that doesn't make you enlightened it doesn't mean you're done with this

third dimensional lesson what makes us done with the hard lessons of life is primarily forgiveness and again if you're in the stages if someone says oh man I'm really cosmic but they keep still talking about other people that's how you kind of catch your if you find yourself coin they and they and they I would have a great day of only day and I would have more of this if only they you know I would have had a better life if only I it's understandable I'm not saying we should call him out on it I'm saying not saying

we we should shame them for it I'm saying I have seen even students of mine and teachers I've known and so on who can't get past that piece but this is interesting not just the negatives they they they because that's fundamental stage of forgiveness when we're still talking about them but there's another way we talk about them that shows were unhealed when we say they are so amazing and I'm not I wish I had what they have I wish I had their beauty I wish they had this I had this and that of them they're still

are they we're talking about except it's praise instead of criticisms or hurts and the praise still means we're talking about others which means you're still not clear because we want to forgive people not only for what they've done to us but we have to forgive them for looking like they have something we don't have all in all we have to let everyone off the hook can we always do that easily no it's it's really a progress it's a you know it's a process and we get better and better at it but

is it on your Christmas list is it up there on your Christmas list besides a car and a boyfriend and a girlfriend in this and whatever whatever is it on the top of your list to say you know God my mom's buying me this my brother's buying me that my girlfriend's buying me this is my partner whatever my friends gifted me something is it on your list to also say and one thing I want is not something they can give me one thing I'm asking for God is the ability to forgive download this to me I'm open I'm scared

but I'm open and so download this gift to me because if you have if you have the gift of forgiveness under the tree so to speak which really means in your heart and soul if you have the gift of forgiveness you really will be able to manifest anything else it's very it's you know it's amazing people underestimate the power of forgiveness so the fundamental stage is when you're still forgiving others but at least you're trying to forgive them so even if it's stages you know we're on our way at

least moving the second level of forgiveness is when you're not talking about others but when you start to recognize yourself for example if I've been betrayed 15 times I can stop and say wow I wonder who the common denominator is oh that's right me Wow I need to forgive myself for believing that I was so unimportant or that I was so little in meaning and value that I needed to experience such lessons say forgiving myself you know I just can't believe this person did this to me I got to forgive them but I also have to

forgive myself because they did that and I'm angry about it but I let them trigger me off my Center so I need to forgive them but I also have to forgive myself because I'm mad at myself for getting off-center I'm mad at myself for feeling weak enough to let somebody do that to me too being susceptible and so on and so on so forgiving ourselves and of course there's more obvious things we forgive ourselves for like harms we've done to others harms we've done to ourselves i I went out with that person I knew I

shouldn't and things went poorly I'm mad at them but I'm also mad at myself I knew I shouldn't have done that you know that kind of a thing so look at it this way and it's an amazing time to be talking about this because whether you're at a crossroads in your life or whether you look at it say for example it's the end of a lunar cycle or at the end of a year or the end of a season all of these become very auspicious times to say I think it's time to move things away drop things to a new level

so you know it's it's about forgiveness so the first stage is forgiving others the second stage is really about forgiving ourselves and the third and wonderful stage is when you have forgiven others and self and you don't have to do one and then another you can work on both at the same time typically we do work on both at the same time but when we have worked on those two all of a sudden we start to realize well wait a minute if all others which is everything outside of me other people and events

are forgiven or I'm moving in that direction really well and I've forgiven myself which is inside of me what's left you look around and huh no there's nobody left a great story of this would be the example example of one prostitute being caught in the time of Jesus being caught and charged with being a prostitute and they typically would stone them to death so they figure okay we're gonna stone this woman to death but then they figured let's use this as a way of tripping Jesus up because he's a

wonderful master man you know and they figured you know this guy's getting away with too much he's getting a little too popular so we want to we want to trip him up we want to cause harm to those who are changing the world that's kind of the way the ego leadership of the world works so it says let's let's get rid of this guy so we'll we'll question him hey Jesus this person's been caught in prostitution so what do you say mr.

mr. master of peace and love what do you think because if he says stoner according to the law stoner then he's going to breach his own ethics that he's been preaching about love and forgiveness on the other hand if he says no don't stoner they're gonna say ah you're breaking the law because they went by the Mosaic law so they said they would say you broke the law and now they would have a reason to stone him and of ministry right so they asked him and he brilliantly doesn't play their game he

instead asks them a question you're absolutely right gosh according to the law yeah she's she's supposed to be stoned to death of course you have to convict her first so to convict her you have to be clear enough to judge her as a sinner and then yes let's by all means let stoner anybody here clear enough to to do that and they're like crap you know because most of more sleeping with her anyway so it's like you know so they walk away and in one of the versions of the story as each one

would walk up to him they notice he was writing they walked up to look and as each one looks over his shoulders he's writing what they themselves did to keep them not being clear enough to judge this woman so he was probably just writing the dates and times that they rendezvous with her anyway so you know there's they're realizing wow this guy is really weird man this guy's on to us so let's just get out of here now the woman in the meantime you have to remember the terror she's curled up

waiting for the rocks to start hitting she can't even hear the conversations they're having she's expecting to be brutally murdered and he walks up to her hey there excuse me she you know shockingly kind of thinks what but you know bad things are gonna happen right he says it's okay calm down you're okay and she's surprised and like how what what happened he says you know where are your accusers she looks around and says they're gone and then he says don't look at me and then what what he means is

they're gone and it isn't me either so the outers are gone one more person for you to look at yourself and if you can find yourself sinless guiltless fearless regretful is you know this then you're done that's forgiveness so he says look around is do you see anybody no then it's up to you now go and send no more and that's a tricky one because go and sin no more means kind of like it it's the word repentance it means when something's been done and I remember this even as a kid if somebody you know wronged me and

they said oh I'm really sorry you know a lot of people say that gratuitously even as a kid I would say well if you mean it then just don't do it again and you know some people would be like oh well no problem other people would almost get angry at that well now you screwed up my plans to do it again later you know what an inconvenience but that's what that means go and sin no more it means as soon as your giving something don't judge it again as soon as you're forgiving someone try not to go into the judgment again as soon as

you're trying to heal something try not to go back into the old pattern of it whatever it happens to be if you're healing and doing whether it's shamanic soul retrieval or breath work and you are releasing something don't let yourself go back to it now it's gonna be tempting there's gonna be moments when pieces of it come up and it doesn't mean pretend those aren't there it means don't let them become the power again so if you feel the tears cry them if you feel the anger beat on a pillow you know

not vent not take stuff out on people but also not to let people take their stuff out on you and so if other people say to you okay I'm really sorry and if they don't you must still choose to forgive and I'll come back to that likely but especially if people trust me on this most people don't apologize and make amends so if anybody ever does damn grab hold of it man thank them say oh my god how rare are you how rare are you thank you what an amazing person you are to even say you're sorry and I mean it

sincerely you're saying to them thank you and God bless you that makes it all the more easy for me to feel peace you see beautiful credit them and the people that don't they're the majority so let's not forgive them well no that's not a good idea because if you imprison them with your judgment and that their own judgments then you're imprisoned with them because you're karmically hooked to them so what you want to do instead is remember this and I've said this many times you know I wrote a book called the

book of love and forgiveness the book of love and forgiveness because it's so simple it's so clear but in there one of the things that I share is it's such a simple technique so simple and it summarizes everything refuse to hate anyone well they did really really horrible disgusting things I know and I'm sorry I wish they hadn't done that but they did sorry that they did that now let's try not to hate them because then you're gonna be karmically hooked to them do you want that no I don't ok so let's

just choose not to hate them and if you hate them it kind of means whoever you are you have power over me don't not do that because you want to despite them I'm gonna not hate you to spite you and don't do that do it because I don't need to hate you what you've done has determined who you are and that's your thing Who I am is determined by my choices my choice to forgive means I am as God created me your choice to cause harm means you believe that you're not what God created you to be but you're

actually wrong you're not anything other than God created you to be so you're actually having a hallucination you're having a bad dream you the the abuser so do I want to hate you for having a bad dream well yes because what you did was horrible ok if my own child had a bad dream a nightmare would I want to hate them for that well of course not that's different it is not different if someone is acting up in this world and there are horrible things that people do but when they act up I have to not hate them

because what they're doing is not the real self it's part of their their dream their nightmare that they are something other than God created do you really believe they would do those things if they knew who they were in God's eyes and God's light in God's image no of course not you can't be in God's image and do ridiculous things like that so those are people that have amnesia they're there their behaviors are inexcusable but they have amnesia and so we want to just you know refuse to hate

them I didn't say oh love them picture the two of you wrapped up in a heart on Valentine's Day and I Love You ex-partner who did all kinds of horrible things to me and my children oh I love you and forgive you it's no problem that's all lying to yourself we don't need that I'm asking you just to say I refuse to hate them I really really AM hard having a hard time with it you can be honest I don't like what they did and it hurts me to even think about it but refused to hate them mmm show some

strength secondly whatever they did right or wrong good or bad whatever whatever they did question number two point number two what can I learn from this what can I learn and I don't mean just really linear things like if somebody abused a family member of yours you say well from now on the family members should never go out of the house that way we'll all be safe that's that's really really grossly limited and not practical but it's linear so what do you want to do you want to say well what can

I learn from this okay maybe I need to if it's a relationship that went wrong you know maybe I need to pace myself and make sure I know people you know instead of jumping in compulsively to a relationship even things like you know my health is really bad and I never really exercised I could just have a practical answer and say I really recognize a lesson I can learn is to love myself loving myself to the point where I deserve to exercise and get fresh air feels great those kinds of things lessons and there's all kinds of

deep and less deep lessons but learn everything you can from it because that's what a master does masters don't go oh gosh I regret this there was nothing I can learn from this whatsoever masters can extract wisdom out of anything out of anything even some of the most horrid experiences we can extract from anything so make it a point what can I learn from this and if you can only extract one thing great man give yourself some some credit for that so I refuse to hate I look at what I can learn from this hmm absorb that just

only one more step the third is no matter what they've done who they were I'm affirming that somewhere in that person is a spark of light made in God's image and I release them to find it now that may sound hard but it's not that hard I can I can pick up a rock and say you know it's just a dense Rock I've known people that are just about as dense as this rock maybe even denser sometimes that's their behavior but I can look at this dark dense rock and still say isn't that funny somewhere

inside of you cold dark rock I can still affirm that somewhere inside of you is a light made in God's image am I wrong no it's the truth there's a spark of light in every particle in the universe so you can you can actually accurately say that and not be you know being flippant about it am i you know saying that it's always easy no but the reason it's not going to be easy sometimes is because you're pissed off you know you're gonna say I'm not affirming that that person has light

that's like a no you know I refuse now here's what you've done you refused to see light in them but you also affirmed there's no light in you now you live in darkness and I'm not saying you should do this just so you don't live in darkness because that would be selfish but if that's all you can do start there and affirm no you know what I am abused but I still have a spark of light in me there an abuser and they still have a spark of light in them you're allowed to go so far as to say do I see the spark

of light L know you're allowed to have attitude about it hell no you can see you can have attitude and talk to God man god I just want you to know this has to be the most challenging person on the planet I cannot believe that there's even an ounce of light in them I can't see it and I don't just in case fYI I got in case you need some feedback I mean I can get you know I can get some signed petitions but just letting you know in case you missed this oh Lord a lot of people agree this person has no

light in them whatsoever God's not fazed by it at all your opinion God's gonna say oh and the more people you can get on your list of people to hate them to dislike them or to think that that person lacks light the more people you can get on the list are adding to your karma of people you have pulled off their Center into hatred how you feeling now you're an abuser of maybe more people then that person abused how does that feel you see it's not worth it got it so simple refuse to hate learn what you can and

then affirm the love the light and everyone just a spark of light and then you're good you know it makes a huge difference so what if the person is never going to change well I'll forgive them but they're never gonna change well wait now you're trying to be a control freak again I think you should go do some forgiveness on yourself for being a control freak but what if they never change its it's not your business you're not affirming their goodness and refusing to hate them on the condition

of them changing no forgive ideally people will repent which means they apologize and make amends they say I'm sorry and they're trying to clear it and don't ever refuse man if you can if you can please try to never refuse someone that wants to say I'm sorry I've said this many times in my life man anyone anyone that could say they've ever thought that have done anything to me and said I want to ask your forgiveness they don't even have to have to ask twice they probably don't even have to

finish the sentence because as far as I'm concerned it's it's already done I don't feel a lot of you know animosities sometimes I feel a little like more like a sadness that people are the way they are you know but I'm healing you know like all people every day that we're on earth there's lessons of that lessons of that healing but there are things I want to say one quick aside about forgiveness even if you become adept at forgiving people more quickly like it had things happen and I'm really good starting to

forgive more quickly if you got that down that's great of course your soul is going to say let's don't forget we got some history to work on too so you start working on that bam bam bam you're working on the history when you have cleared enough then there's another layer you go from the healing of your your stuff with other people and your own self then all of a sudden you start working on the collective consciousness just earlier this week I remember a certain incident arose and I saw it and

I really I felt the tears and I felt the feelings you know about it and I realized this is related to you know the people that dragged people off to war and sometimes they never come back those people have partners they have children you know it's just one of the more screwed up things on planet Earth you know because war mongers they're not the ones fighting the wars you might remember if you're a music buff you know if you like some of the old good rock music the band Black Sabbath they had a song called war pigs

and even though people thought those guys were like into the dark occult kinds of things they wore crosses for a reason they said we're speaking up against the dark things of this world and we wear crosses to protect ourselves because they came from very fundamental religion Catholicism and things of the like and so they were superstitious and they thought we have to protect ourselves because they sang songs like that war pigs saying you know it's not them that go off to war they send other people off to war and you know in these

guys when they're singing this they believed purely like the old word meant they believed in God in the devil and that the devil tries to screw with people and and it and that the war pigs of the planet are controlled by the devil so that's what they sang about and they believed wow if we're gonna sing about stuff like this we better kind of project ourselves you know so you know it's it's like that it's it's I've seen that and I've seen you know how sad man just the children not seeing a parent

for a year and a half at a time you know and these people you know going off to war serving you know and sometimes getting drafted or sometimes just registering and all that but but the idea of not coming home to your kids you know it's kind of horrible but also abuses to children but see let me clarify this now abuse of any kind is not good I don't care if it's to an older person a middle-aged person a young person and how do you define abuse everybody's got a little different definition some

are more clinical and linear and intellectual here's Michael Mayer dad's definition of abuse any time you are not feeling the the presence of love you're feeling abused if you're not feeling loves presence then something's not right that means you're feeling scared you're feeling a beaut you're feeling neglected something is not right if you're not feeling the presence of love and safety peace you know God words if you're not feeling the presence of God you're likely feeling abused subtly or majorly

overtly covertly there's a form of abuse it's not just always when someone does some horrible thing - even when you just feel sad that you're missing someone that's uh that's an abuse because in God those people are not separate from us but in this dimension we think they are separate and we we feel hurt and hurt abuses us if and I'm not saying it's on purpose I'm not saying we're always conscious but these are forms of abuse so cry them when you need to cry them scream them into a pillow when you need

to scream them into a pillow but know you'll go from working on your issues to our issues because we have global collective issues such as abandonment there's not just your abandonment there's also ours you think your abandonments heavy you think your betrayals are heavy yeah mine's really bad someone did really something horrible really tuned into the collective one try that on for size cuz that one you you when you tune into the collective traumas of the world you you will feel so overwhelmed almost

instantaneously you'll want to spontaneously combust and it's why some people take their own sometimes why some people take their own lives because they're so sensitive they can feel the vibes out there of the world that's not right not the God world it's the ego based world and they become overwhelmed with it and it is overwhelming there are times when I myself you know I know all the rules I do all the stuff and I still there's times when I I can feel the sinking because of stuff you see it and

it potentially triggers but the point to it the goal for me or any of us is to say I got it I totally got it I'm sinking into this and this is an important lesson so if I just sink into it I sort of I sort of missed my opportunity and maybe it's kind of like saying instead of graduating fifth grade I'm going to get set back a year on the course called forgiveness you know I get set back because I flunked as they used to call it I flunked my grade in practicing forgiveness I started believing in the

power this world has when I started getting overly hurt sad angry confused oppressed by government and whatever else it might be I missed that oops my bad and if you try to do any of the deep or any forgiveness at all but if you definitely if you try to get to collective levels of forgiveness without tethering yourself to God forget it you might as well just forget it you're going to fail any form of forgiveness as a human is gonna fail or it's going to be fake and you'll think it's real but all true forgiveness must

be done with God because true forgiveness is spiritual forgiveness so you know I pray this is making sense but even if someone says they'll never change it's you know it's something we've got to say that doesn't matter you know I'm forgiving them on a spiritual level I'm not forgiving humanly so my human self does not need to sit around waiting for their human self to change see that's when you know you're subtly still being controlled by your ego so when you the question comes

up from many people well how do you finally let go you see once again if you're gonna try to control gee I'm gonna let go 20% today like it's a valve you open it it's not it's not real you're trying to control it still so how do I truly let go first connect with God in your forgiveness process and second set your heart on it do you really want to forgive yes I do why ask yourself a couple questions why do you want to forget because I have two wrong answer because I'm supposed to wrong answer because God won't be happy

with me if I don't wrong sir so I don't have bad karma and have to come back again wrong answer although it's true gee I guess I need to get to a place where it's the right thing to do it just seems like it's the only right thing it seems like it brings that person release in peace it brings me release in peace wow I I think I can do that you know just talk yourself through some of this because the letting go won't be happening if it's not authentic it will not be happening if it's not authentic

so ask yourself a couple questions and you know what please remember this if your answers are no like no it isn't real no I don't really want to forgive but I have to don't be ashamed of that because you're still at least starting the movement of it so just say that say you know you can you again you can have attitude when you talk to God trust me on this God on a 0 to 10 scale I know you want me to forgive them to a 9 or 10 no I refuse I'm so hurt I'm so pissed what say whatever cuts it out whatever and saying

no you know what God I'm gonna give him a 1 I'm gonna give him one fraction of a bit of forgiveness today excellent God's like hey guess what everyone we got an ounce of forgiveness out of that stubborn person I'm joking you know but and and it's good it's really healing it's beautiful because I promise you when you get that one happening your soul's gonna start saying I wonder what to feels like and so on so you get the ball rolling and it starts to unfold and that's how forgiveness lit leads us to

feeling peace forgiveness leads us to a peace that surpasses understanding here's why because forgiveness is a state of consciousness that is beyond understanding so forgiveness brings peace that's beyond understanding because forgiveness is beyond understandable humanly speaking the human head does not comprehend forgiveness because the human head goes wait let it let's see how this works chronologically they did this to me and for no good reason which means I'm a victim and they're a victimizers so let's see ergo there is

no real reason forgive them so I'm not going to so we're looking for it give me some understandable reasons why I should but if you already still believe in the chronological story you can't truly forgive because you're already saying this is already unforgivable now go ahead and talk to me and spirits trying to talk well the wait I've already said this is unforgivable but I'm open talk to me I'm not gonna get anywhere so it doesn't happen so it's beyond human understanding this concept of true

forgiveness it's it takes us to two levels to places beyond human comprehension which i think is very cool and this also shifts us beyond victimhood doesn't it when I really start to understand things when I say to myself well so-and-so did this but what can I learn from this see if I see I can learn something I'm already breaking out of the mold of a victim I also could say this isn't the first time somebody betrayed me let's say it's not the first time it's like the fifth time so this is

a pattern of who whose pattern is it is whose pattern is it me mine so I need to forgive myself so I'm not a real really I'm not a victim it looks like I am because these people did something really hurtful and that's not really cool but am I really really a victim no because I did participate that lessens it a little bit doesn't it then what about have I ever betrayed anyone on this planet in this lifetime and just forget about other lives right we'd like to have I ever done this to anyone yeah

probably oh so if it's a karmic repercussion then are you a victim you see so just dismantle the whole notion that you are in any way possibly a victim and again I know all the games I know all the stories I know what's gonna go on in the head of some they're gonna say well you're telling me just to forget the notion of being a victim but there are some people I know that are just innocent victims what if they're only one year old you know then clearly they you know our victims well we can't even get into that

because that's just going to stir more judgment and anger of people but the one year old how old are they again one really only one you're certain they've never lived any other lifetimes have no lessons have no nothing none of us want to hear that you know hearing you know abuses that happened to a dear loved one of mine man no my head doesn't immediately go to the place of Wow isn't that amazing how these things work themselves out and the person learned lessons they needed to learn no they

looked like nothing but a completely innocent party and by human standards some people are by human standards but humans are screwed up but by human standards we can make things look like you know like an innocent victim but there's so many layers man so many layers a person can say I ran out of gas today it's a new car and we can say your how did that happen well then the meter said it has was full but it was empty after I drove around that's a victim because they bought the car it's a new car there's no reason the

things should be doing that true that looks like you you're completely innocent and forget karma and all that just let's just start with that one this is in this example so you say to that person god man that's just a drag you got to talk to that company get a refund or something on that gas gauge yes cuz I'm a victim yes I agree but wait a second just curious what was the last time you filled up the tank all about three months ago wait a second didn't it occur to you that you might be running out of gas no because it said

full the whole time just because we are blinding ourselves to lessons we can learn or pieces we participated in doesn't mean it confirms more victims so it's just a very simplistic example it's not going to be easy to apply that in you know in really hard kinds of areas but just do what you can just do what you can try to just break some of the concrete up the concrete of the concrete mind as we say that says there's only you know one way to look at this and so forth and it's I'm a victim and all that

so forgiveness ends victimhood forgiveness ends patterns for this ends limitations and limiting patterns mind you forgiveness breaks up karma forgiveness erases stuff written in the book of life and the Acacia chrec ERDs that say that that because we did this this this in the past certain lessons have to come to us those pages are erased and there's nothing to support the case forgiveness releases guilt forgiveness releases shame forgiveness releases regrets and so it brings peace because without those other

things something's going to fill that space and we start feeling more and more peace forgiveness is not easy it can be challenging but as you get used to it you start to realize you know what it doesn't matter if it's difficult it feels so good and it seems so right I'm just gonna do it anyway you know it's a kind of an interesting thing to describe this but even our aura chakras trauma lodges in our systems our cells of our body forgiveness breaks that stuff up and releases the the the darkness we have a dark cloud sometimes

over us energetically in our aura forgiveness parts it and brings the sunlight in forgiveness brings like smiles to our organs that are sometimes clenched in hurt forgiveness washes our arteries more clean because stuff doesn't stick because we're not regretting or resenting and the the plaques in the in the colon and the arteries and wherever else the plaque goes dang we don't have anything to stick to because no one is stuck in consciousness so there's no signs and symptoms of stuckness like sludge

sticking to the arteries or the walls of the body in any way shape or form so forgiveness it just it just opens us up forgiveness is like having a spiritual version of everything you could ever do for yourself that's good massage yoga healthy eating you know a feeling like you've forgiven something can actually feel like you've just had one of those healthy nutritious multi green stuff drinks you know you drink that down is like wow you can sometimes feel quite quite a buzz those kinds of things you know

wheatgrass and all those things and and forgiveness does that and more because it not only makes your head kind of go wow it's that aliveness but it clears records and stuff that you can't even see or know about that we're going to haunt you were haunting you and or we're gonna manifest in your life somewhere so forgiveness is not just a clearing of the past it's of preventive of the future a clear stuff all the pains and the things we held on to they start to fall away and I'm noticing at this time it's

incredible to see that the number of things that are falling away I sit in you know sort of like in contemplation of it like wow sometimes there's a period where in where things seem okay in our lives of course that's fine okay is not great but okay is fine and then we go through times when there's hurts and betrayals and all those weird things lessons don't hate learn lessons and affirm the goodness in everybody if you can because the seasons keep changing you see so after the season of the harms

there's going to be goodbyes now and the universe is going well listen now that you finish this lesson in this lesson are you are you cool with us letting go of those things oh no I've got to stay stuck to them because I feel resentment confusion and so on then you get to keep them but what if you're willing to let them go you know what if you can say to the University yeah and fall is a good time maybe the end of a month is a good time cyclically you know to do that if you want to do it twelve times a year

I always talk about it when New Year's comes I talk about doing 12 days of Christmas and walking through the zodiac and so that we're as conscious as we can in recreating our new life our new existence like a whole new launching into a whole new level of consciousness and but one thing after another after amazing just endings I'm noticing at this time there's there's people you know I don't hear from anymore that kind of thing that happens sometimes the people I've really ever been closest to

it's kind of cool I mean it's amazing I'm still sort of in touch an ex-wife or whomever but I don't think about it I don't I don't you know friend since since elementary school is in still and you know we're still in touch and so forth and it's not because it's one of those gratuitous human relationships those are worth letting go of but it's because there's spirituality yet there as the root whether it's the guy from elementary school or that what girl I was married to there's a lot of

spirituality to those relationships so I don't keep them around just to have somebody to chat with or watch ballgames or something not my thing you know it's God in all things love life spirituality and all things so those are the people I'm most connected to if people don't live that in a real kind of a way and you can tell you know if people are using your if people are talking the talk but not really living it you know sometimes it's just kind of better to walk away and just you know lovingly

depart ways and so that happens but never hate them never because they also represented a time when we were in that state of mind to be in the relationship or friendship or whatever with them so we let that pass and I see the symbols of that all around all kinds of endings I mean there's so many I couldn't even bother to say right now but all kinds of amazing endings and I'm seeing it like cleaning out stuff of my own cleaning out projects completing things is a way of saying goodbye to the past

forgiveness applied is not just someone that upset you even when you let go of objects that represent old limiting patterns it's a form of forgiveness it's a it's a goodbye and you know it's it's pretty amazing it's pretty astounding and it is you become more spiritual you become more like spirit you become more a spirit when you're not carrying a bunch of baggage because spiritual beings are not dense so don't be so dense forgive let go clear out stuff let it all move let it all go that way we

can grow we grow in consciousness our hearts expand the bodies open up more just like nutrients you know there's organs and glands going wow what is happening it's this washing you know of life and love you guys know if you know anything about my teachings I've often taught about the dark night of the soul and that's a really heavy time of cleansing it's a difficult time it's when seeing lots and lots of things in your life seem to be going wrong hard stuck painful but it's it's actually

occasional it's it's an occasional cycle for all of us well a couple times a year anyway I mean a couple times a lifetime anyway and and it's still for the purpose of cleansing so the more we clear love cleanse forgive the less the universe will do it to us so you know we're gonna have to clear it anyway you just get to do it the easy way or the hard way forgive and there's less that you'll have to be brought through as a lesson to teach you to forgive but that's also okay if you want to do it the hard way

at least you're still going the same direction you're still giving being given an opportunity for you to forgive and just you know watch it and observe and be be kind of like wowed by how when I set my mind to be able to be ready willing to forgive how just all the right things come sinking in locking in to be worked on something you find that was in the drawer that you didn't see for a long time Wow a dream you know that what's the purpose of that person and and I teach this and I mentioned it in the

forgiveness book but I teach this and a lot of people never considered this when I set my mind to forgive three days later have a dream about somebody it's no accident they entered my mind so that I could do further forgiveness work or I run into them unexpectedly or I just did they just their image face pops into my mind what you need to do instead of oh that was weird because I didn't help did it when you see them so you can start with wow that's weird but then catch yourself and go wait a minute Wow

this is part of that forgiveness thing isn't it I set the intention and the right people are lining up and it wouldn't do you any harm to credit spirit for that because the more you can credit spirits not like credits like you know like spirits like Oh aren't I wonderful aren't I amazing the way I can hook these things all up but when we can recognize and credit spirit it puts us more in more alignment with spirit to say I know it's you I know you're bringing the right people in and thank you be gentle with me you know

be gentle with me I sometimes feel a little frail man with these people's faces come in I get a little scared but I know you won't give me more than I can handle which is a compliment because you you brought up so-and-so yesterday and Wow you know I could almost have said that was an impossible one but yet if you thought that I could handle it maybe you know better than I do and maybe that's quite a compliment that we've worked up to being able to work on that particular issue so don't be

surprised who comes up what memories come up what events when you have a dream about middle school it's already telling you it's you're going back to something to deal with in middle school whether it was a pleasant thing to absorb and go wow I'm really grateful or a dark memory you have something to do with it there's there's homework there so I pray that this is all made sense and you know suggest that you just recognize how simple not always easy but how simple the process of forgiveness

really can be do not you know let people inflate it into something that seems so impossible try to keep it simple spirit